Thursday, August 17, 2006

Motorcycle Quotables

I have collected fun quotes and bits of wisdom for a while. I have not verified the citations, but supply them in the form I have seen it presented. Choose your favorites and share a laugh. If you do not see one of your favorites, I would encourage you to post it. I will add it to the list.

Great motorcycle quotes and wisdom...

Four wheels move the body. Two wheels move the soul.

“200mph, no hands. d**n that’d be cool right before the part where you die.”
– A. Duthie

“There are only three sports: mountain climbing, bull fighting, and motor racing. All the rest are merely games.”
– Ernest Hemingway

“Calling upon my years of experience, I froze at the controls.”
– Stirling Moss

“Most motorcycle problems are caused by the nut that connects the handlebars to the saddle.”

Seen on a motorcycle’s rearviews:
“Warning: objects seen in mirror are disappearing rapidly”

Got a $5 head? Get a $5 helmet.

“There’s the V-4 thing: there’s just something about it that inline 4s don’t have, and V-twins have too much of.”
– Murray Duncan

“Life may begin at 30, but it doesn’t get real interesting until about 150.”

If you’re going to lead, then lead. If you’re going to follow, get the hell out of my way!

“Faster, faster, faster, until the thrill of speed overcomes the fear of death...”
– Hunter Thompson

“Keep thy eye on the tach, thine ears on the engine, least thy whirlybits seek communion with the sun”
– John 4:50

“You start the game with a full pot o’ luck and an empty pot o’ experience... The object is to fill the pot of experience before you empty the pot of luck.”

“Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in one pretty and well preserved piece, but to skid across the line broadside, thoroughly used up, worn out, leaking oil, shouting GERONIMO!”

“Insisting on perfect safety is for people who don’t have the balls to live in the real world.”
– Mary Shafer, NASA Ames Dryden

“I believe in treating everyone with respect, but, first you have to get their attention.”

“Never trade the thrills of living for the security of existence”.

Everyone knows Honda’s attitude in the GP Paddock! “ Who will be behind us this weekend? “

“A zest for living must include a willingness to die.”
– R.A. Heinlein

If you think you don’t need a helmet, you probably don’t.

“Racing is living, everything else is just waiting”

“If you wait, all that happens is that you get older.”
– Larry McMurty

“Why are motorcycle dealers closed on Sundays? Because Sunday is for worship... Catholics go to church, Motorcyclists go to the track.”
– Justin Skalka

I want to leave this world the same way I came into it: Screaming and covered in blood.

Kansas: home of the highway with 318 miles and 11 curves.

What does a Harley and hound dog have in common ? They both spend most of their time in the back of a pickup truck. What differentiates the two ? The hound dog can get in and out of the pickup under his own power.

“98% of all Harleys ever sold are still on the road. The other 2% made it home.”

Midnight bugs taste best.

Saddlebags can never hold everything you want, but they CAN hold everything you need.

NEVER argue with a woman holding a torque wrench.

Never try to race an old geezer, he may have one more gear than you.

Home is where your bike sits still long enough to leave a few drops of oil on the ground.

Routine maintenance should never be neglected.

It takes more love to share the saddle than it does to share the bed.

The only good view of a thunderstorm is in your rearview mirror.

Never be afraid to slow down.

Bikes don’t leak oil, they mark their territory.

Don’t ride so late into the night that you sleep through the sunrise.

Pie and coffee are as important as petrol.

Sometimes it takes a whole tankful of fuel before you can think straight.

If you want to get a job, you may have to compromise your principals (you may even have to shave).

Riding faster than everyone else only guarantees you’ll ride alone.

Never hesitate to ride past the last street light at the edge of town.

Never mistake horsepower for staying power.

A good rider has balance, judgment, and good timing. So does a good lover.

A cold hamburger can be reheated quite nicely by strapping it to an exhaust pipe and riding forty miles.

Never do less than forty miles before breakfast.

If you don’t ride in the rain, you don’t ride.

A bike on the road is worth two in the shed.

Respect the person who has seen the dark side of motorcycling and lived.

Young riders pick a destination and go... Old riders pick a direction and go.

A good mechanic will let you watch without charging you for it.

Sometimes the fastest way to get there is to stop for the night.

Always back your bike into the curb, and sit where you can see it.

Work to ride & ride to work.

Whatever it is, it’s better in the wind.

Two-lane blacktop isn’t a highway – it’s an attitude.

When you look down the road, it seems to never end – but you better believe it does.

A rider can smell a party 5,000 miles away.

Winter is Nature’s way of telling you to polish.

A motorcycle can’t sing on the streets of a city.

Keep your bike in good repair: Motorcycle boots are NOT comfortable for walking.

People are like Motorcycles: each is customized a bit differently.

If the bike isn’t braking properly, you don’t start by rebuilding the engine.

Remember to pay as much attention to your partner as you do your carburetor.

Sometimes the best communication happens when you’re on separate bikes.

Well-trained reflexes are quicker than luck.

Good coffee should be indistinguishable from 50 weight motor oil.

The best alarm clock is sunshine on chrome.

Learn to do counter-intuitive things that may someday save your butt.

The twisties – not the superslabs –separate the riders from the squids.

When you’re riding lead, don’t spit.

If you really want to know what’s going on, watch what’s happening at least five cars ahead.

Don’t make a reputation you’ll have to live down or run away from later.

If the person in the next lane at the stoplight rolls up the window and locks the door, support their view of life by snarling at them.

A friend is someone who’ll get out of bed at 2 am to drive his pickup to the middle of nowhere to get you when you’re broken down.

If she changes her oil more than she changes her mind follow her.

Catching a yellow jacket in your shirt @ 70 mph can double your vocabulary.

If you want to get somewhere before sundown, you can’t stop at every tavern.

There’s something ugly about a NEW bike on a trailer.

Don’t lead the pack if you don’t know where you’re going.

Sleep with one arm through the spokes and keep your pants on.

Practice wrenching on your own bike.

Everyone crashes. Some get back on. Some don’t. Some can’t.

Beware the rider who says the bike never breaks down.

2 bikes is useful because at least one can be raided for parts at any given time.

Don’t argue with an 18-wheeler.

Never be ashamed to unlearn an old habit.

Maintenance is as much art as it is science.

A good long ride can clear your mind, restore your faith, and use up a lot of fuel.

If you can’t get it going with bungee cords and electrician’s tape, it’s serious.

If you ride like there’s no tomorrow, there won’t be.

Bikes parked out front mean good chicken-fried steak inside.

Gray-haired riders don’t get that way from pure luck.

There are drunk riders. There are old riders. There are NO old, drunk riders.

Thin leather looks good in the bar, but it won’t save your butt from “road rash” if you go down.

The best modifications cannot be seen from the outside.

Always replace the cheapest parts first.

You can forget what you do for a living when your knees are in the breeze.

No matter what marquee you ride, it’s all the same wind.

Patience is the ability to keep your motor idling.

Only a Biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window.

Four wheels good, two wheels better

There are those who have crashed and there is those that will crash.

There are two types of people in this world, people who ride motorcycles and people who wish they could ride motorcycles.

Never ride faster than your guardian angel can fly

It is good to have an end to journey towards; but it is the journey that matters in the end.

Learning to ride at 41 (or 91) is better than never learning to ride at all!

Friday, August 11, 2006

West Nile: "Home, Home on Our Range"

Bad news on the doorstep:

From KBTX:

The explosion of human cases of West Nile continues in Brazos County. Friday, health department officials said they are now aware of seven possible cases of the disease.

Officials announced there are five people who are "presumptive positive" for West Nile in Brazos County. That's in addition to the two cases that the state have confirmed, which we first reported to you Thursday.

One of the most severly effected people, and the only one who has released his info, is a Bryan Police sergent. However, there's a lot of hope and prayers for this man.

There was a huge amount of rainfall in July last month, filling up streams and waterholes that are typically dry all August long. Also, a different breed of day-flying misquito just tested positive as a carrier in this county. I'm sure these factors have contributed this out break at least some.
"They had a big jump on us this year," said Texas A&M expert Jim Olsen of the mosquitoes in the area, "so we anticipated that if West Nile was going to pop, it was going to pop big, and it did."

At the press conference, the local West Nile experts laid out the oft-repeated but often necessary statements: West Nile is here, there and everywhere in the county.

"This is a preventable illness," Charles Williams with the county health department said. "The way you prevent the illness is not to be bit my mosquitoes."
You know, I wish they could just be that straight forward about STD's. "This is a preventable STD. The way you prevent the illness is not sleeping around."

In addition to the human cases, the first local horse has tested positive for West Nile. No word on where in Brazos County the animal is stabled. The health department is encouraging all horse owners to see their veterinarian to get vaccinations for the disease.
I did a quick google about vaccines for horses and found they've been around for approximately three years. The website for the CDC info on this hasn't been updated since 2003 so I presume that date is related. However, maybe there's hope that an effective human vaccine can be developed quickly since effective one for other animals is now available.

Math Joke for Friday

As I attempt to enlighten you to the joys and truth of math, I present to you the following:

The other day, I was speaking to a friend, Kimberly, and she said she planned to teach an art course dedicated to the math and functionality of art. Personally, I was truly confused. I had never heard math and art used in the same sentence before.

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Computer Genius Am I

Hubby** and I learned all the in's and out's of Windows Operating System because of our then toddler son. At the time, he would reach up and grab the mouse, franticly moving it to and fro, hitting the button as fast as he could. He had to be fast because I was chasing him down right away! It was always a marvel to me to discover what damages and changes that boy could do to our computer because of 30 seconds of random mouse clicking.

However, it was my job to UNDO all those weird things. Hence, I learned Windows Operating System.

But here's another funny blog post, "Revenge", a story of the boy getting the hand up on his mother. I feel for this mother.

**Hubby claims that he already knew everything and learned it in high school. I dispute this claim of his.

Monday, August 07, 2006

Are your kids reward dependent?

School's coming back and with it my home will accumulate a-hundred-and-one small junk toys ordered through the Oriental Trading Company, more of the same kindI just got rid of during this summer's garage sale. They're passed out at schools as prizes for every good behavior. At my children's elementary school, they get prizes for behaving in the lunch room, for staying straight in line, for being the best class in P.E., for good grades, if they wear an orange shirt on Wednesday... I can keep naming them forever.

Thankfully, I've been able to counter that public school culture at home. Hubby and I debated a long time what our parenting philosophy was going to be. Were we going to pay for chores done? Should they have a set allowance? What will their responsibilities be? How much control will I exert over their allowance spending once I "give it to them"?

My favorite parenting book, Kids are Worth It!, by Barbara Coloroso has this list to help clue you into if you're raising a reward dependent child:

The following is a checklist of warning signs that your child might be reward-dependent. Most children will exhibit some of these signs as they struggle to develop their own sense of self. It is the frequency, intensity, and persistence of these behaviors that would indicate a need for concern and intervention.

1. "Does to please" to win approval of those in authority.
2. Does what is told without questioning.
3. Lacks initiative, waits for orders.
4. Sense of self is defined externally; has dignity and worth when producing what adults want.
5. Who she is and what she does are one and the same. If she does something "bad," she sees herself as "bad."
6. Uses his history as an excuse for his behavior.
7. Is pessimistic, despairs easily.
8. Places blame outside self: "He made me do it." "It's not my fault."
9. Hides mistakes, feaful of adult's wrath.
10. Lies to avoid consequences and cover mistakes.
11. Feels controlled.
12. Feels worthwhile only when on top, when number one.
13. Is competative, gets ahead at the expense of others.
14. Needs to be perfect, views mistakes as bad.
15. Seeks approval and fears disapproval, fearful of rejection.
16. Is conformist. Goes along with the crowd.
17. Considers behavior by its consequences. "If I don't get caught, what is wrong with it."
18. Focuses on the past and the future, misses the moment. Worries about "What if..."
19. Experiences self-talk that is negative; parental injunctions keep playing over and over.
20. Has private reservations about public self; "If they really knew me..."
21. Uses only simple problem-solving skills to try to solve all problems.
22. Is always concerned about the "bottom line."
23. Says what she thinks other want to hear.
24. Is cautious, insecure.
25. Has a mercenary spirit; is selfish, self-centered, greedy, does good deeds to obtain rewards or avoid punishment.
26. Is cynical and skeptical; views world in terms of "us" and "them."
27. Swallows values without question from those in authority.
28. Frames deeds with "should."
29. Holds on to resentments.
30. Is oversensitive to criticism, diqualifies compliments.

"Rewards and punishment are the lowest form of education" - Chuang-Tzu

I would think the easiest problem to spot would be #9. This makes #8 & #10 side-effects of the #9 problem. If your kid is scared of you and in tears because he dropped his dinner plate, then you've got a real problem. If everytime an accident happens, your kid cries and lies, you haven't taught him how to deal with the problem. And when I say, "how to deal with it", I mean, to fix the problem rather than sobbing hysterically. For example, if the kids drops his dinner plate, he should think about cleaning it up. He'll probably still need your help cleaning it up but at least he's taken control of his mistake, his problem, and made it right. That's what you have to do in the real world too.

I think the worst side effects are the last four. If you're a kid whose looking for an authority to praise you, you can easily be sucked into a gang. You listen to your gangs values ("the gang family comes first"), you follow the gang's ideals ("He should be beaten for that look he gave me"), you never forgive any little thing, and instantly hate any teacher who gives you a criticism.

And oddly enough, I took a parenting class with that book at the very same school I was complaining about! Well, to be honest, they were quite a bit better about handing out prizes this year than last year.